Chapter Text
'ALUCARD! DON'T LEAVE ME!' Olivia frantically clawed at the glimmer of light slipping through the cracks of the coffin lid. 'DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE! ALUCARD! ALUCARD!'
But her tearful pleas were for naught, and the door vanished, plunging her into complete darkness as the hands dragged her further into the abyss.
'NO! NO! NO! ALUCARD! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE! DON'T LEAVE ME!'
Suddenly screams that were not hers reverberated around her and millions of red eyes morphed out of the darkness, their sights set on Olivia's petrified form. The wall of eyes caved in around her, and Olivia could clearly see the eyes belonged to corpses that were so horribly mangled that she couldn't tell where one began and ended. Blood and shredded viscera leaked from their eye sockets and onto Olivia as they seized her, their screams overpowering hers.
Tears poured down her cheeks as their blood soaked through her clothes and their fingers clawed at her skin like they intended to devour her scrap by scrap.
The pain was searing and the more she struggled, the more painful their claws became.
But, despite knowing he wouldn't answer, Olivia still called out to him with all her heart.
"ALUCARD!"
Suddenly, the corpses vanished into thin air, leaving a single dark figure in their place and her wounds miraculously healed.
It had no distinguishable features, save for a pair of red eyes and what seemed to be a cape billowing behind it.
Still shaken, Olivia wrapped her arms around herself and regarded the figure with apprehension although it made no effort to touch her.
And for a moment, they just stared at each other, the figure blankly and Olivia with fear.
Eventually she was able to find her voice, even though her tone was nowhere near as fearless as she hoped.
"Who are you?"
The figure said nothing.
"Are….you one of Alucard's familiars?"
Yet again, no answer.
At this point, Olivia was starting to get angry and she quickly got into an offensive stance, suspicious that all of this was a test by Alucard to evaluate her resolve.
She wouldn't put it past him to do something like this.
"If you are trying to make me give up, you are wasting your time. I came here for answers, and if I have to fight to get them, then so be it."
Finally, the figure answered her.
By sliding its sword out of its sheath and pointing the blade towards her heart.
"Last chance, Little Rabbit." Alucard's voice drifted from above. "You can still run away and forget about your little quest."
"Run away?" She muttered, closing her eyes for a moment before gently grasping the blade in her hands. "Sorry, I never really learned how to."
Then Olivia jammed the blade into her chest and everything faded into darkness.
Alucard had to laugh as he stumbled back onto his throne, clutching his chest which had not housed a heartbeat in centuries.
Even after all these years, she continued to amaze him.
"I didn't think you'd actually do it. Is that bravery or stupidity?!" He cackled, a wide smile stitched across his face. "I keep underestimating you, Little Rabbit. You truly are a fascinating human."
The fabric of his coat bunched under his grip as he felt a light pounding in his chest, his smile growing at the sensation.
A heartbeat.
Olivia's heartbeat to be precise.
"So be it then." Alucard craned his neck back and closed his eyes, syncing his breathing with the heartbeats.
Then he slid his glasses off his face and opened his eyes, a tint of blue laced in his irises.
"Just remember," He uttered, an accent to his voice as the heartbeat grew louder and louder. "This was your choice."
Olivia awoke to find herself lying on the dusty stone floor of a dungeon.
Various chains and stocks were scattered around the circular room with the only source of light being the moon.
'Where am I?' She hesitantly crawled to her feet and crept towards the door, relieved to find it unlocked.
The dungeon led out to an equally chilly and dismal hallway that was lined with stone and littered with dead mice.
'It's like no one has been down here in ages.' Olivia thought to herself as she tiptoed down the hallway, hearing someone shouting in a foreign language somewhere above her. 'That language….I can't understand it but….I have a feeling I've heard it before.'
A vast staircase awaited her at the end of the hallway, and as she climbed it, she was reminded of the stairs to Alucard's dungeon.
'Will this lead me to him?'
Once Olivia reached the top, she found an ajar wooden door and peered through the crack.
A hallway adorned with lanterns awaited her on the other side, and the shouting had grown louder. But, now that she was closer, it didn't sound so much like someone shouting in anger but in joy. After making sure the coast was clear, Olivia slipped out of door and scurried down the hallway, her bare feet not making a sound against the wooden floor.
It was like she was floating yet she could feel the dirt beneath her feet.
Olivia bounded around the corner and gasped as she found the source of the shouting in the courtyard.
There, hopping around on a set of stones, was a young woman and a little boy.
The woman had long black hair and light blue eyes like the little boy and both of them had jewels sewn into their clothing, meaning they were nobles or royalty.
Olivia positioned herself behind a column and watched the two of them hop around with carefree grins.
'They must be mother and son.' She smiled to herself, noting they had similar smiles and facial structure.
The mother shouted something and held her arms out, the silver rosary around her neck shining in the moonlight.
And the little boy squealed in joy as he leapt in his mother's arms, cuddling against her as she kissed his forehead with a gentle smile.
Memories of doing something similar with her own mother flashed through Olivia's mind but she pushed them aside when she noticed the mother walking away with her son nestled against her.
Then, everything went still when the little boy made eye contact with Olivia and she collapsed against the column, clutching her chest and biting back a scream.
It was like someone had slashed out a piece of her heart.
But, however agonizing the sensation was, it felt oddly too.
"Alucard?" Olivia whimpered, her heart pounding against her rib cage. "Is that you?"
And all the pieces came together.
She was in Alucard's memories and this was his childhood.
It was surreal to see Alucard as a child—much less the wide-eyed, ebullient child in front of her.
'What happened to you?' She wondered, watching as Alucard's—no, Vlad's—mother kissed his forehead again and bopped him on the nose, earning an adorable laugh from her son. 'What changed? Please…tell me.'
Immediately, her surroundings began to swirl around her, becoming a cyclone of color before everything slowed down and Olivia found herself sitting in the middle of a field.
Tall grass and weeds surrounded her and, in the distance, she could spot the castle perched on the horizon.
The sunset had dyed the fields a blood red and this uneasy feeling sprouted in her chest.
'Alucard….Vlad…whoever you are….am I still in your childhood?' Olivia placed her hand over her heart, hoping it would guide her to where he was. 'What happened here? Please tell me.'
A strong gust of wind swept through the field and riding on it, Olivia could hear the sound of a child crying.
Her heart throbbed again as the uneasy feeling grew and she quickly chased after the breeze, pushing aside the tall grass as she went.
'Where are you?! Why are you crying?! What happened to the adorable little boy in the courtyard?! Answer me!'
Then, as she swept another armful of grass out of her way, she found him.
He was kneeling on the ground, clutching something to his chest as his shoulders quivered. Gone were the royal garments and instead he wore a shawl and rags like some type of prisoner.
"Alu-…Vlad." Olivia whispered, kneeling down next to him. "What's wrong? Why are you dressed like that? Why are you so far from the castle?"
Vlad just continued to sob as he lifted the object he was clutching so dearly to his face; Olivia's heart dropped at the sight of the silver rosary his mother was once wearing.
"Mamă…" He sniffled, his bright blue eyes overflowing with tears. 'Vino înapoi.."
"Ngh!" Olivia hunched over as the agonizing sensation crawled up her veins and into her neck.
This feeling…it was exactly how she felt the night she lost her family.
Was it the same for him?
But…she wasn't alone…and he was.
"Vlad." Olivia winched, crawling forward and holding a hand out to him. "Please…don't cry. I'm here. You're not alone…"
But, just as her fingers grazed his cheek, a group of soldiers stormed out of the grass and surrounded them with their swords drawn.
Vlad fell back and whimpered in fear as the soldiers—the same ones who swore to protect him—aimed their weapons at him.
They had come to take him to the Ottoman Empire by the orders of his own father who had sold him to the sultan to prove his loyalty.
And with his mother six feet under, there was no one to protect him.
No one.
"NO!" Olivia threw herself in front of Vlad, shielding him for the soldiers with a fiery glare. "You will not take him! I won't allow-!"
One of the soldiers lunged forward, his arms passing right through Olivia's chest, and grabbed Vlad by the collar, hissing as the screaming child bit his hand.
"Wha…?" Olivia gasped, patting her chest to feel it solid beneath her touch. "H-How? Am I a ghost?"
'You said so yourself,' Alucard's voice whispered in her ear. 'These are only memories….and you are merely a spectator. Nothing more.'
"Nothing…more?" She muttered, touching her chest. 'Then why do I feel this agony if I'm just a spectator? Why?!'
'….Why indeed?' He chuckled and Olivia swore she could feel his hand brushing over her neck. 'Not even I understand what is happening. The moment you impaled yourself with that sword, I lost control of the situation, so now all we can do….is watch.'
Olivia's head shot up as she realized the soldiers were dragging Vlad away, and despite knowing she was only a spectator, Olivia scrambled to her feet and chased after them anyways.
"Let him go!" She cried, her surroundings slowly changing once again with every step she took. "Vlad! Vlad!"
Then, in the blink of an eye, she was running down a dark hallway and a man dressed in Turkish clothing was dragging Vlad away by his hair.
And the boy, who was fighting for his life before, was hanging limply in the Sultan's grip with his once vibrant blue eyes now a dull gray.
"Vlad! Run! Fight back!" Her words were pointless yet she still screamed them until her throat was raw.
Memory or not, Olivia couldn't—wouldn't—sit by idly and watch this unfold.
She was a soldier of Hellsing for God's sake! There had to be something she could do!
Entering a lavishly decorated room, the Sultan threw Vlad onto a bed and tore off his clothing, a lecherous grin plastered on his face.
"No…" Olivia's legs gave out from under her and she collapsed to the ground, her eyes wide in terror. "No….please God no…."
Vlad clung to his mother's rosary as the Sultan shoved his face against the bed and began to undress himself, chuckling under his breath.
"No….." She shook her head, frozen in place on the ground. "No….someone please…help him…please…somebody save him.."
Then, as the Sultan climbed on top of him, Vlad opened his eyes and stared Olivia dead in the eye. And, he gave a wiry smile and mouthed out the words, "No matter what, I will not beg for mercy."
Then it began, but Vlad continue to smile as his tears soaked into the sheets.
"NO!"
Blindly, Olivia charged forward and clawed at the Sultan's back, her screams drowning out the horrific scene in front of her.
"YOU f*ckING BASTARD! HE IS A CHILD! GET OFF OF HIM! GET OFF! GET OFF! GET OFF!"
But her cries fell on deaf ears and her assaults hurt nothing but air.
"ALUCARD!" She bawled, her hands phasing through Vlad's trembling ones. "LET ME SAVE HIM! LET ME SAVE HIM! I HAVE TO SAVE HIM!"
But she couldn't.
She couldn't rescue him.
She couldn't murder that monster.
She couldn't do anything to stop it.
All Olivia could do was watch.
"MAKE IT STOP!" She buried her face into her knees and slammed her palms over her ears. "MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"
Yet time didn't stop.
And time didn't stop those centuries ago when the Ottoman sultan raped Vlad as a sign of his power over the imprisoned, eight year old prince. As a way to show him he was nothing but a toy—a pawn, and he was powerless to do anything but cling to his rosary and lay there.
"AAAHHH!" Olivia crumbled to the ground, clenching her chest while her heart was torn apart chamber by chamber. Despite her ear splitting wails, she could still hear them. And despite her teary vision, she could still see them.
This isn't what she expected.
If this was the truth, she didn't want it.
But that didn't matter now.
Alucard had warned her, but Olivia was so obsessed with obtaining the truth that she jumped head first into this 'mystery' and now she had to deal with the consequences.
She had no one to blame but herself.
So, Olivia laid there, choking on her tears and clawing at her chest as the horrific spectacle went on in front of her.
"…You were only a child…' She gasped out, her body becoming colder. "You…were the same age as I was….the night you saved me…"
And as her vision faded away, Olivia feebly reached out towards Vlad one last time.
"I couldn't…do the same…for you…"
Then everything went black and she spiraled back into the darkness.
A glass shattered, spilling wine across the stone floor and into the cracks.
Alucard sat hunched over in his throne, panting with his hand at his chest.
The recollections of his imprisonment mixed with Olivia's anguish were consuming him from the inside.
With every hit her heart took, it was like the scorching blow of a Bowie Knife.
"This is the price of sharing one's memories." His voice was raspy as he slowly sat back up. "For the entire duration, both parties' hearts become one in body and soul."
Olivia was pleading for him to stop it, to put an end to everything yet that was not in his power.
It was in hers.
She had been the one who birthed the connection between them, and she had to be the one to sever it.
"You have only seen a small fraction of the truth, Little Rabbit." Alucard chuckled, her heartbeat slowing down and the pain ebbing away. "Will you continue to the very end or will you give up? I'm very curious to know."
This time, Olivia awoke to find herself in the heart of a massacre.
Hundreds of Wallachian soldiers were laying waste to the diminishing Ottoman soldiers, beheading and disemboweling them with their spears.
And, in the heart of it all, was their general and their prince, Vlad Dracul III.
He had grown into a beautiful young man with the haunting eyes of a warrior and a king who had come to have his revenge against those who wronged him.
In his wake, Vlad impaled body after body on wooden poles, and Olivia noticed that some of them were still alive; their mangled bodies twitching while their blood dripped down the poles and formed a river below them.
The air reeked of blood and Olivia had never seen such madness in all her life, but she convinced herself this was justice.
The Ottomans were barbarians and made Vlad into a child soldier, and now the warrior they'd created had return to extract his rightful vengeance.
'They are bad people.' She told herself, her hand over her heart. 'They are monsters who tortured countless of people. The world is better off without them.'
And so Olivia watched as Vlad captured the Sultan and slammed his face into the dirt, just like how he did the same to him as a child. And she didn't flinch or cover her eyes when Vlad took a metal spear and impaled the Sultan from his anus to his head.
Over and over and over again.
One for every night the Sultan had dragged Vlad into his chamber and had his way with him, leaving the boy a bruised and bloody mess afterwards.
'It's over.' Olivia sighed, rubbing her chest and watching Vlad jam the spear into the ground and hoist the Sultan's skewered corpse into the air. 'You've had your revenge. You can be at peace now, right?'
But madness didn't stop there and more corpses were added to the macabre display, this time not just enemy soldiers but innocent people.
Men, women, children, even his own subjects.
"S-Stop!" Olivia shrieked, scrambling to her feet. "Stop it, Vlad! They aren't your enemies! You'd had your revenge! You have your kingdom back now! There is no need for this cruelty!"
But the pile of bodies grew higher and Vlad's eyes grew duller and lifeless with the passage of time.
"Why?!" Her heart pounded violently in her ears. "Why are you doing this?! Why are you becoming like your captors?! Why?!"
"God's will is for us to fight!" Vlad's booming voice resonated throughout the graveyard, sending an electric shock through her heart. "God spares no salvation to those who beg for it nor is he merciful to those who would beseech his benevolence! To pray, you must fight! And if we pray enough, God shall rain down upon us!"
"So all of this senseless killing is for God to bless you?! Is that why?!" Olivia cried out, her heart on the verge of beating out of her chest. "Those who slaughter others in the name of God are nothing but murderers! God has nothing to do with this war!"
But the graveyard expanded and his army diminished, but he kept fighting for God's glory and all these other empty promises he filled his head with.
This is who Alucard was.
He was a monster who had sacrificed his own people for the sake of a God who never came.
This man whom she loved dearly….was the embodiment of everything she hated.
"How could you?" She limped forward, tears bubbling in her eyes as she navigated through the forest of bloodied spears and the rivers of blood. "How could you become the very thing that you despised?"
And, lying in the middle of one of the rivers, was a woman and two little boys, their intestines ripped out of their abdomens and swords severed through their chests.
The two boys looked exactly like Vlad.
"Even your own family…How could you?" Olivia crumbled to her knees as the pain in her heart grew more unbearable. "You….You vile monster….answer me….ANSWER ME, MAD KING! HOW COULD YOU SACRIFICE EVERYTHING?!"
And the answer she received….was the moment of his execution.
The execution ground was situated on a hill high above the valley and was framed perfectly by the sunrise.
And what a lovely sunrise it was
'Was this the last thing you saw?' Olivia wondered as she coughed up blood, the valves of her heart collapsing one by one. 'Did this sunrise greet you upon your death?'
From the way her heart ached at the sight, she knew what the answer was.
Olivia saw him march up the hill, his body ragged and battered and his head and arms locked in a wooden stock.
From his birth to his death, Vlad was always a prisoner and never a free man.
Even when he had his rightful throne, the weight of his past and his hatred towards the God who abandoned him kept Vlad from moving forward.
What a horrible, vile, and pitiful monster he was.
Olivia didn't want to look at him as it would only cause her more pain, but when she saw the executioner shove Vlad to his knees and raise his axe, she ran towards him.
'No….No….No….I can't let him die alone…!'
And as Olivia approached the grounds, she witnessed Vlad open his mouth and lick up the blood of his fallen comrades, just as the axe swung down and beheaded him.
All was silent, save for the sound of his mother's rosary clattering against the stone platform.
Olivia couldn't take it anymore.
She had seen enough.
Falling to her knees, Olivia threw her head back and let out a heart breaking wail, blood gushing from her nose and mouth.
This was the truth she had been so desperate to obtain; she should've been thrilled.
But instead, Olivia tore at her chest, ripping away her skin and muscle to reach her heart. She even snapped off her own ribs until her heart was in plain sight.
And, jutting out from the center, was the scabbard of Alucard's sword.
Grasping the handle, Olivia wrenched the sword out of her heart and she felt nothing as the world around her collapsed into oblivion.
'Enough…' She closed her eyes and released the sword, allowing her body to float aimlessly in the deteriorating world. 'I have seen enough…'
Then, a pair of familiar hands grasped onto hers and lifted her up until she felt a cool breeze on her face.
Olivia opened her eyes and found herself lying on the dungeon floor, safe and unharmed.
Slowly, Olivia sat up and touched her chest, where her heart was beating normally, before turning to the left and finding Alucard sitting in his throne.
Neither of them said a word.
There was no need for them, not after what just happened.
But, eventually, the silence was broken by Alucard.
"Did you find what you were looking for?" He mumbled, clasping his hands together on his lap and watching as she stood up and walked towards him.
Olivia stared at him blankly for a moment before snatching him up by his cravat and punching him in the face; Alucard didn't bother to resist or fight back as she attacked him again and again.
"HOW COULD YOU?!" She bellowed, all her rage and hatred coming out at once. "THEY WERE YOUR PEOPLE! YOUR SUBJECTS! YOUR FAMILY! AND YOU KILLED THEM ALL FOR THE SAKE OF GOD?! YOU WERE NOTHING BUT A DISILLUSIONED MURDERER!"
Olivia was only hurting herself, but she keep punching him until her knuckles bled and Alucard's cheek was caked in her blood.
Then after a while, she just stopped and stood there, panting heavily.
"How could you….?" Her voice was but a faint whisper now. "How could you? How could you? How could…they?"
Alucard's eyes shot open when he felt Olivia cupped his face in her hands and press their foreheads together, her tears dripping onto his face.
All traces of fury were gone and what remained was sorrow.
"How could they do that to you?" She breathed out, remembering the innocent child who cried out for his mother. "You were just a little boy...and they….they…!"
Surprising him once again, Olivia collapsed against his chest and wept, her arms wrapped around his neck.
"I'm sorry, Vlad! I'm so sorry!" Her tears soaked through his clothes and all he could do with stare down at her in confusion.
The remnants of her heart and the taste of her blood mixed with tears overwhelmed him and rendered him speechless.
Alucard could taste her anger, her fear, her sorrow, and worst of all, her empathy.
With a growl, he shoved Olivia away and sent her tumbling to the ground.
"I don't need a measly rabbit to shed tears for me!" He snarled, his fingers digging into the arms of his throne. "You have your answers! Now leave me be."
Olivia sniffed and wiped her eyes, which were red and puffy, before silently crawling to her feet.
She didn't smile or tell him goodnight like before.
No, Olivia just blankly turned around and walked away, reaching the hallway threshold when he spoke up again.
"….Do you still feel the same about me?" Alucard murmured, watching her freeze in place. "Despite everything, am I still worthy in your eyes?"
Olivia didn't turn around but her answer came almost immediately.
"I…don't know what to feel anymore." Her voice was devoid of any emotion. "About you or anything else."
He didn't know how to reply, so he let her walk away and the moment Olivia was out of sight, he placed a hand over his chest.
Her heartbeat was gone.
"….Thought so." He sat back in his throne, grazing his fingers over where she had been crying.
Despite her fear and hatred, the little rabbit had shed tears for the wolf.
"Ridiculous."
Alucard was a dog, a servant for the Hellsing family, and a monster who had denounced his humanity.
He wasn't a child who longed to crawl into his mother's arms and cry his pain away.
His mother had died long ago, and so had he.
He was a monster.
A disgusting, irredeemable monster.
But…for one moment….just for one moment…he had a heartbeat again.
Just for that moment…he was human again through Olivia.
And it was Olivia, a naïve little rabbit, who had held him close and wept on his behalf.
Alucard gasped as he felt something roll down his cheek and splatter onto his gloves; it was a bloody teardrop.
Gritting his teeth, Alucard slammed his palm over his eyes as more tears streamed down his cheeks.
'Unbelievable. f*cking unbelievable.'
But the tears didn't cease, and a small part of Alucard wished he hadn't sent Olivia away.
He didn't know if she would come back to see him again tomorrow, and deep down, Alucard knew he shouldn't care.
But, regrettably, he did.
